Fatty Fatty Ren and The Weight Fairy
by Teh Future Mrs. Kyo Sohma
Summary: [By Kakuri] Ren sighed as she walked into the bathroom. She knew she was getting fat. She just didn’t know how much. Which why she weighed herself. [For Angel]


**A/N:**

**Hello… it's Kakuri… with another story…**

**This one is for Angel-san… my sister's friend.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Fruits Basket. Sorry. I know you wish I did.**

Ren sighed as she walked into the bathroom. She knew she was getting fat. She just didn't know how much. Which why she weighed herself.

Akito had told her many of times that it was time. Shigure had also said, for when they did it, Shigure said he could only feel mounds of fat and not lush, ripe boobs.

"Stupid Shigure!" Ren rumbled through her fat rolls as she stepped upon the scales. Flab from her neck bounced rapidly. Moaning, she tried to read the scales.

"My fats in the way!"

"You mean, the weigh?" Came a sexy voice from behind her. Why, it was Hiro! Hiro in a purple tutu with tight, black stockings. Ren stared. Hiro glared.

"Look," Hiro said, placing a hand to his fore head area. "I'm the Weigh Fairy, okay? I'm here to help you loose weight!"

Ren was shocked. She never knew her long lost cousin was the Weight Fairy. She got upon her chubby little knees and bowed her head. Well, she was actually leaning against fat, but who cares!

"Hiro," Ren began. "Please help me! I want to be thin so Shigure will come back to me! And come into me!"

Hiro nodded sympathetically. Ren's eyes watched his intently. Her hands were doing something completely different though…

"How do you think Kyo and Yuki stay so damn in shape?" Hiro growled under his breath. "It's me! Me dammit! I do everything for this family! Akito mauled Kisa only because I made her skinnier than her."

Ren gasped.

"So, to get back at her, I want to make you super thin. Thinner than God!"

Ren cheered. "YAH!"

"Let's get to it then, shall we?"

Hiro struggled to lift Ren from the ground and into her podgy little feet. Ren smiled. Had about as many teeth as a new born baby. But Hiro didn't care.

"Outside," Hiro said as he flew gracefully. Well, as graceful as a beached whale.

"Weight Fairy," Ren asked. "How will you make me thin?"

Hiro sighed and clasped his little hands to his heart.

"I will use my wonderful fairy powers of course!"

Ren nodded. She rolled into the garden and came to a halt when she hit a tree. She waddled to Hiro. Hiro looked sick.

"Right," Hiro coughed, reaching for his wand. "I don't know how I'll do it, but by God, I'll try!"

He raised his wicked little wand and threw it viciously into the mounds of fat around Ren's throat.

"Argh!" She yelled as the pointy bits on the star dug into her neck.

"Poopy poopy pants!" Hiro chanted, waving his hands around and dancing. "This woman wants romance! Poopy poopy pants! Make her fit into Shiggy's pants!"

"Nice one to rhyme pants with pants," Ren grunted, rolling her eyes. Hiro clapped. Suddenly, in a flash of Burns Brand Electricity, Ren shrunk to the size of a porn star.

"HIRO!" She wailed. "You did it! You did it!"

Hiro was tackled by the new, big-breasted Ren. His face rammed into her newfound mammories. He blushed and reached for his wand, which was trapped within her cleavage.

"Now!" Ren's heart skipped. "Too rub it in Akito's face!"

"Away!" Hiro screeched as they ran towards Main House. Ren was so happy she didn't have to roll anymore, or audition for The Biggest Loser. Her skimpy clothes lifted as she ran. Hiro peeked under her skirt and viewed his handy work.

"Well," He smirked. "You certainly look good,"

"It's all thanks to you!" Ren smiled as they stormed into Akito's bedroom. Akito's head lifted from the dead bird she was currently sleeping on. Her not-as-thin-as-Ren's body seemed obece.

"Weight Fairy," Akito acknowledged, before turning to her skinny mother. "Ren,"

"Akito."

"What are you doing here, skank!" Akito suddenly yelled. Her gangsta-ness flicked on.

"j00 3r3 2 t4k3 m4h z000d1a( aGa1n! G37 0U7!"

"j00 suxorx." Ren stated loudly, before whore slapping her daughter. Akito attacked, swiping at her mother's face with claws that she'd obtained from Kyo when she ordered his cat form's nails be clipped.

"DIE BIATCH!" Ren wailed, before shoving Akito's face into her boobs. Akito couldn't breathe against the skinny skin.

"Bbbbbblllaaarrrggghhh!" She bbbbbblllaaarrrggghhhed into Ren's chest. She struggled and cried, but it had no affect.

She died a painful and not-flat-chested death.

Hiro clapped. He'd been eating pop corn the whole time. He threw some at Ren.

"Yay you!"

"I WIN! MY BOOBS ROXOROX!"

Ren then did a super happy yaoi dance.

**A/N:**

**Thanks for reading… hope you like it Angel-san…**


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